Bad Romance  By Eric Cartman
by qwertyuiop67891011
Summary: Cartman x Kyle fan fic about Cartman singing lady gaga bad romance - it totally relates to Cartman and Kyle's relationship.  TOTALLY RAMDOM  PLZ REVIEW. NOTE: INCLUDES SWEARING!


**HEY ALL I'M NEW HERE AND YOU'LL BE SEEING MY SOUTH PARK FANFICS ALOT MORE OFTEN. HERE IS MY FIRST ONE WITH ERIC CARTMAN SINGING BAD ROMANCE BASED ON KYLE. I THINK THIS SONG REALLY REPRESENTS THEM AS A COUPLE- SO UMM YEAH WITHOUT A FURTHER- ADO I PRESENT BAD ROMANCE- CARTMAN STYLE! XD NOTE : COMPLETELY RAMDOMNESS LIES AHEAD!**

-Stan,Kyle,Kenny and Eric (Known as Cartman) are standing together as per usual-

Cartman: Hey fags!

Kyle: Shut up fatass!

Cartman: Oi stupid fucking jew! I'm big boned!

Kyle: Thats it! I'm sick of this just admit your a fat fuck!

Cartman: Screw you guys, I'm going home...

-Cartman walks off-

Kyle: What a spoilt bitch.

-Stan and Kenny frown-

-Cartman gets home and goes to his bedroom, suddenly a flashing light comes into his room sparkling from every angle-

Cartman: What the fuck?

-It lowers down onto his table and stops glowing, Cartman goes up to it-

Cartman: An I pod? For me. SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!

-He checks out the songs-

Cartman: Heh heh, this one will do perfect (evil grin)

**Bad Romance CARTMAN STYLE!**

Cartman: ! Caught in a bad romance!

! Caught in a bad romance!

Rah ah a-a-a ah! Roma rom-a-a!

Gah,gah ooh la la.

Want your bad romance!

-Kyle walks down the corridor while Cartman follows him-

Cartman: I want you ugly, I want your disease,

I want your everything as long as its free!

I want your love...love love love! I want your love.

OH!

Kyle: Umm what the fuck dude?

-Cartman is behind a tree in the school play ground-

Cartman: I want your drama, the touch of your hand!

I want your leather studded kiss in the sand.

I want your love...love love love...I want your love.

Love love love I want your love!

-Gets out photo of Kyle-

Cartman: You know that I want you...

And you know that I need you...

I want it bad want your bad romance...

-At the bus stop the next day, Cartman bursts out;-

Cartman: I WANT YOUR LOVE AND I WANT YOUR REVENGE!

YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE!

I WANT YOUR LOVE AND ALL YOUR LOVE IS REVENGE!

YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE!

Stan: Jesus Christ dude you okay?

Kenny: Yeah that was pretty fucked up!

Cartman: Err..gotta go!

-Cartmans runs down the street singing:-

Cartman: ! Caught in a bad romance!

! Caught in a bad romance!

Rah rah! a-a-a ah!

Roma! Rom-a-a!

Gah! Gah! Ooo la la!

Want your bad romance!

-At night Cartmans in bed-

Cartman: I want your horror, I want your design,

Cause your a criminal as long as your mine,

I want your love...love love love, I want your love!

HEY!

-Kyle and Cartman are doing a project with each other in the school libary the next day-

Kyle: GODAMMIT CARTMAN! CONCENTRATE AND STOP SINGING LADY GAGA!

Cartman: (ignores Kyle) I want your psycho, Your vertical stick,

Want you in my rear window, baby your sick...

I want your love...love love love..I want your love!

Love,love,love I want your love...

Kyle: Ahh...fuck it! I'm gonna study somewhere else.

-Kyle leaves-

Cartman: -Stares at Kyle ass-

You that I want you.

And you that I need you...

Cause I'm a free bitch baby!

I want it bad, want your bad romance!

-Cartman stands on the table and screams:-

I WANT YOUR LOVE AND I WANT YOUR REVENGE!

YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE!

OOOOOOOOH!

I WANT YOUR LOVE AND ALL YOUR IS REVENGE!

YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE!

School Libarian: SHHHHHHHHH! OR DETENTION!

-Cartmans run out of the libary and into the corridor-

Cartman: ! Caught in a bad romance!

! Caught in a bad romance!

-That night Cartman sneaks into Kyles room and goes up to Kyle's bed-

Rah rah a-a-ah!

Roma! Rom-a-a!

Gah Gah! Ooo la la!

Want your bad romance!

-Cartman blind folds Kyle and puts him in a body bag then drags him to his house (Kyles still asleep by the way)-

Rah rah a-a-ah!

Roma! Rom-a-a!

Gah Gah! Ooo la la!

Want your bad romance!

-Cartman drags Kyle upstairs into his bedroom, trying not to wake up his mother-

-Cartman puts Kyle on a chair then ties him to the chair and gags him and blindfolds him, Kyle wakes up-

Kyle: (Muffling) AHH WHERE AM I! HELP!

Cartman: Walk, walk, fashion baby!

Work it! Move that thing crazy!

Walk, walk, passion baby!

Work it! I'm a free bitch baby!

-Cartman takes off Kyle gag and blind fold but he is still tied to the chair-

Kyle: C-c-c-cartman?

Cartman: (Blushes) I want your love and I want your revenge...

I want your love...I don't wanna be friends...

Khal now that I have got you where I need you now...

We gonna make it work some how...I don't wanna be friends!

Kyle: GAH! GET ME OUT OF HERE! I'M FUCKING STRAAAAAAAAAAAAAIGHT!

Cartman: (Continuing) (Shakes head) No! I don't wanna be friends...

Kyle: We weren't anyway dumb ass -.-

Cartman: (Ignores Kyle) (Licks lips) Caught in a bad romance...

Kyle: (Freaked) Okay now this is creepy...

Cartman: I DON'T WANNA BE FRIEEEEEEEEEEENDS! WANT YOUR BAD ROMANCE!

CAUGHT IN A BAD ROMANCE!

Kyle: This is a dream right? .

Cartman: (Grabbing Kyle's coat) WANT YOUR BAD ROMANCE!

Kyle: '...'

Cartman: I WANT YOUR LOVE AND I WANT YOUR REVENGE!

YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

I WANT YOUR LOVE AND ALL YOUR LOVE IS REVENGE!

YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! WANT YOUR BAD ROMANCE!

(Gets really close to Kyle's face)

CAUGHT IN A BAD ROMANCE! WANT YOUR BAD ROMANCE!

RAH RAH A-A-AH!

ROMA! ROM-A-A!

GAH GAH OOO LA LA!

WANT YOUR BAD ROMANCE!

(Passionatley kisses Kyle room goes silent as their lips lock together)

The End.


End file.
